Heather's Boutique, picture from Getty Images

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

David Beckham - you need help

Dear David

I have admired your work for many years. I think you are very good at football, especially when you kick the ball. My mother and I always think you look very fashionable on the pitch, (and on the bench).

However, I have read about your recent activities i.e. Signing a 5 year deal worth £128 million to play for LA Galaxy.

In one word, you need help.

Have you really thought about this David? Many people have tried and failed to deal with this sort of thing, it's never easy.

It's no good putting your head in the sand Victoria, a little bit of shopping here and there is not going to make any difference.

How on earth are you going to spend all that money??

You have millions, what are you going to do?

If you don't take action, you're going to have so much money you'll become delirious, and that could be embarrassing in the post match showers.

So I've come up with a few solutions for you, I do hope you have time to look at them in your busy schedule, this took me a whole minute to write.

  • Clearly there aren't enough days in the week for you to spend all your money, so start thinking about shopping on what should be a time of rest....Monday mornings.
  • Get into politics and run for government. Obviously you'll never win because you're not an American citizen, but it will waste a huge amount of money. Could be a laugh?
  • How about making a movie, they always go over budget, you could call it. "Beckham" - Beckham's cultural Learnings of America for make benefit glorious game of Soccer.
  • Buy a few vineyards in Napa Valley, they can't be cheap. I'm sure the kiddies would love to help with picking and squashing the grapes at Chateau de Beckham. Just think of all the parties you could have, invite some heavy drinking friends, they would sup your profits away in no time.
I hope this is helpful to you both, let me know via the news how you get on.

Happy spending, yours sincerely

Heather x

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Blog Tag

Things have been so busy here lately I've barely had chance to co-ordinate my outfits properly. Not to mention the colour malfunction between pink and lilac at the top of my page. But I have bought a new umbrella today to cope with all this rain, so something has been accomplished.

As I mentioned on my previous post, I have been blog tagged. It says I need to reveal 5 interesting things about me. That's easy.

1. I once got a free pen from a magazine.

2. I can send a text message standing up.

3. I double bag my shopping.

4. I like to sunbathe facing South South West.

5. A button on my favourite coat is missing.

I'm actually quite flattered to think that this very knowledgeable person has thought of little old me and my blog. So with that in mind I'm going to be all technical today.

Apologies to my regular readers, you may wish to visit another blog, try my favs grouchy old Mr P and darling Kaz.

2 Years ago.

Computers were not good to me. They used to stare at me blankly or make weird noises when I tried to print things. Something had to be done before ebay started to lose money.

Men seem to be good with gadgets, but us girls can be technical and logical too! So I telephoned my geeky friend Robin to come and sort me and my computer out *flutter flutter*.

He was round at my place quicker than you can say "Google my You Tubes".

"What do you use your computer for?" he enquired rather nosily.
"Erm, the usual stuff emails, printing my cleaning rota, and shopping" I replied, choosing not to mention my embarrassing daily habit of cooing over pictures of puppies and rabbits at Cute Overload.

So there he was fixing my silly old computer, re booting my software and harmonizing my hard drive. After a morning of doing lots of complicated stuff, I was left with something quite extraordinary.

"It's called Linux" he said.

"A what?" I said.

"Linux" he said.

"A Linux?" I said.

"No, just Linux, not A Linux, it's an operating system. " Robin said with his very precise hat on. "See how you get on with it, and give me a call if you have a problem" he said trotting out the front door.

That was 2 years ago now and my computer works perfectly. I don't understand it??

My server serves, my browser browses and my printer prints, it seems Robin is a genius. Thanks to him and Mr Linux, the viruses and crashes have gone.

These are replaced by cute reliable penguins called Tux. My computer behaves so well these days I have almost forgotten what used to go wrong.

That's my technical talk over with, phew. Next week I'll be pondering how Victorian Horoscopes may have influenced the Scientist Charles Darwin's theory of Evolution. He was an Aquarius obviously.

I have to pass this tag thing on so over to you Murph and Oz. fetch.

Heather x

ps The only thing I can't do is play my favourite game, Note Attack, can anyone help me?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Happy New Year

I hope everyone had a marvellous Christmas and a Happy New Year for 2007.

I also hope you all got the presents that you wanted, dearest Santa was very kind to me, bless him.

On my return from the Chateau, I see that I have been "blog tagged" by a very technical IT person, how exciting I can hear you all thinking.... more on that soon.

I apologise for my very small post, I haven't fully recovered from the festivities and think I may need to have a bit of a lie down.

Love to you all Heather x